


The Policemen-Mystery

by Staubengel



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-24
Updated: 2019-05-24
Packaged: 2020-03-13 17:48:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,240
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18945859
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Staubengel/pseuds/Staubengel
Summary: For a prompt on tumblr from katy-133:"Gabriel sitting behind a desk, receiving a receipt that says Aziraphale used a miracle to "put forty policemen to sleep," with Gabriel reacting to that."





	The Policemen-Mystery

It wasn’t like there was nothing else to do this shortly before the Apocalypse.

Things needed to be coordinated, they needed to be prepared. There were ways these things needed to be done, and since the Apocalypse only ever happened once, despite several dry runs, everybody in Heaven was new to this.

That being said, a lot of these things still had to be done from Gabriel’s office, and Gabriel’s office was still serving its thousands-of-years-old duty to inform him whenever a receipt arrived with a low _bing._

When the low sound rang out, Gabriel stopped in the middle of signing some papers and stared at the receipt for some confused seconds. Then he remembered that the Earth hadn’t ended quite yet, and there was still a field agent down on it, doing his duty.

Sighing, he reached out for the receipt that meant Aziraphale had worked a miracle, and studied the words written on it.

He frowned.

Then he read the receipt again.

And again.

And, while he was at it, another time.

When Raphael leaned into his office, he still wore a big frown on his features.

“Something wrong?” the other angel inquired. “We need you in the conference room. Though I guess it’ll take another twenty minutes before Michael succeeds in putting up the tech and sorting through his file cards.”

“I got this receipt from Aziraphale,” Gabriel replied, shaking his head softly. “And I can’t quite make sense of it.”

“Really? What does it say?” Raphael left the doorway and came over to Gabriel’s desk, half sitting down on its edge.

Gabriel shook his head one more time, reading the receipt yet again.

“It says right here that he put forty policemen to sleep.”

“Policemen? To sleep?”

“Forty of them.”

Raphael rubbed his hand over his stubbled chin in thought. “Maybe they suffer from insomnia,” he mused. “And he had to help them out.”

Gabriel raised an eyebrow at him. “Forty policemen at once?”

“I hope they don’t have to sleep in the same bed.”

Gabriel’s brow raised even further.

“What? That would be really crowded.”

“Can you take this a little more seriously?

“Why? The Apocalypse is coming. What does it matter what Aziraphale did to forty policemen?”

Gabriel blinked at him in absolute disbelief. Raphael smiled and shrugged in return.

“He’s still an angel and my direct subordinate,” Gabriel explained very slowly, as if Raphael was an unreasonable child. “Even if the Apocalypse is coming, I can’t just let him do what he wants.”

“So, do you _want_ to investigate what Aziraphale did to forty policemen?” Gabriel grimaced ever so slightly and Raphael had to laugh. “Should _I_ go and see what Aziraphale did to forty policemen?” he suggested.

Gabriel scowled at him, as if this was completely ridiculous, but Raphael didn’t miss the shadow of hope that crossed over his features. He smiled, leaned in, and kissed Gabriel’s forehead.

“I’ll quickly nip down there,” he said softly. “It’s a great excuse to be late for Michael’s meeting.”

Gabriel smiled. Raphael, too, was an archangel, but even within this status there were ranks, and Gabriel’s was higher. He was the direct boss of several angels, while Raphael wasn’t. Sure, he was authorised to approve or decline a lot of requests, files, and inquiries, but those were all generally to be brought before an archangel, not specifically him. Gabriel, on the other hand, had special rights and duties he had to fulfil, because some requests, files, and inquiries were to be approved or declined only by him. He couldn’t possibly leave for a trip to Earth this close to the Apocalypse. Raphael could.

“Just don’t be too late,” Gabriel advised, but his tone was warm. “You know how cranky he can get if somebody ruins his great speeches.”

“Almost as cranky as you,” Raphael teased as he slid off Gabriel’s desktop. Then he laughed as he saw his lover’s expression. “I’ll make it quick,” he promised. “I’ll just check what Aziraphale is up to. Hold a seat for me.”

Gabriel smiled and shook his head. Raphael winked at him and then was gone, materialising right at the spot the receipt of the miracle had been sent from.

 

He showed up at what appeared to be some rather old building. Looking around, he took in his surroundings. The floor was panelled with wood, flecks of darker and lighter brown stretching throughout the long hallway. The walls were a dark green at the bottom and something off-white at the top, broken by doorways here and there that were cased in dark wood.

Raphael assumed this building to be a school, hospital, or some other place built to hold many people in assorted rooms. Why forty policemen were lying asleep on the floor, though, was still an unsolved mystery.

Carefully, Raphael navigated his way over their bodies and sprawled out limbs, following what he thought must be the way they’d been heading. As he peeked around a corner, his face split into a grin.

Aziraphale was there, and he was not alone.

If Raphael wasn’t completely mistaken, the other man-shaped being with him was Crowley, the Serpent, Aziraphale’s supposed adversary. And it would have looked like he really _was_ his aeons’ old adversary, because Crowley currently had the angel by the collar and pressed up against the wall, if their mouths hadn’t been entangled in a passionate kiss.

Raphael had no idea how it had come to this, why they both were here, why forty policemen were after them. But to be angelically honest, Raphael didn’t care in the least.

His heart had been rooting for the two of them ever since he had first seen them together a couple hundred years ago. He had a special sense for things like this, even though his focus was on healing.

All angels could feel love, but not many of them knew how to pin it down. There were countless forms of love and, generally, angels were just content with knowing it was there, not caring too much where it stemmed from or what it was directed at. Love was a good thing, that was enough. Raphael, however, had taken pleasure in looking deeper and untangling the big jumble love could be, and he had gotten excellent at understanding it.

That these two had shared more than just a general fondness, not just an “Okay, I don’t hate you, but that’s all” had been clear to him right from the beginning, ever since he had seen their auras pulsing in each other’s presence.

What a pity he didn’t come down here more often. Maybe he would have seen them tongue-go-ing much sooner.

Since he didn’t want to interrupt them, Raphael settled for a silent gesture of triumph and a little dance, and then vanished just as tracelessly as he had come. Who cared about why the policemen had come here? If he had been in Aziraphale’s shoes, he would have put them all to sleep just the same.

Grinning widely to himself, he brushed off his suit as he arrived back in Heaven and then set off to join the other angels in the conference room, where Michael was – no doubt – still shouting at the laptop and projector. He wondered whether he should whisper the news into Gabriel’s ear when the presentation got too boring. The yelp the other angel would give certainly would lighten up the mood in there.

 

**Author's Note:**

> I think we all know which scene from the trailer inspired this ;D


End file.
